A Shoot vs. Baking

In early December my husband received a call from his brother.  M., as we’ll refer to him, was calling to say he’d been diagnosed with the aggressive Mantle Cell Lymphoma, apparently a rare form of the non-Hodgkin’s lymphomas.

M. is extroverted, fun, gregarious, positive, smart, engaging, strong, an incredibly hard worker (‘cause he loves what he does!), and, most importantly, a son, brother, husband and dad (amazing dad, in fact).  To receive news that someone so vital and young has been given this grim news is incredibly difficult to accept, but Cancer doesn’t wait for our heads and hearts to catch up…M. and his family had two weeks from the day of diagnosis to the day that he was admitted to the hospital for the start of a very aggressive treatment plan that will require him to be hospitalized for the majority of the next four months (*this is where I applaud the Canadian medical system…people complain about it but it’s damned good and I feel so blessed to live in a place that has the resources to act quickly when someone’s life is in danger, and not at the expense of your life savings, home, etc.).

In 1997 my mom was diagnosed with 4^th stage Breast Cancer and I often find myself recalling the many thoughtful gestures that friends and family bestowed on her, and on us, during that difficult time.  I remember being blessed with more frozen meals than we had room for!  I’ve always been, and will always be, so grateful for people’s kindness and generosity during that time.  The conundrum, for me, now, was that I am not known as very domestic (some would laugh that I even said ‘very’!) and so: was I really going to inflict my cooking on my loved ones!  Mostly I joke, but it truly didn’t feel like the natural fit when their family and friend network is full of amazing cooks! I really wanted, and still want, to help; but how?

K&C, c.2004

A short time before M.’s diagnosis he had commented, at a family dinner, that they wanted me to do their family portraits.  He recalled that their last family photos were done, by me, about eight years ago (long before Bella Faccia!).  Then came his diagnosis and I wondered if we could go ahead with the shoot, but there simply wasn’t time.  During that week I really struggled with how to help, and you do feel, in these times, a burning desire to 'act'. 

My sister-in-law is nothing short of INCREDIBLE…she’s kind, smart, generous, and the poster child for dedicated.  She was (and still is) spending all available time with M. at the hospital and, in between, organizing kids’ schedules, attendance at hockey tournaments, book reports, and, during December, Christmas prep, all whilst carrying a burden that simply won’t allow for rest.   She is ever cognizant that she must try to manage her own myriad of emotions, as well as the emotions of her children.  Their children, K. & C., as we’ll call them, are two of the nicest and most well rounded kids that I’ve ever met (seriously, even if they were no relation, these are phenomenal young people); but they are ‘kids’.   We all know how devastating this is for adults; I cannot imagine how scary and overwhelming it must be for them. The fact that M. has to be hospitalized for the treatment was bound to be really hard on them especially, as they are used to him playing a pivotal role in their daily lives; but it is only made harder knowing that if you have any infections at all you must not visit the ward (it is imperative that people visiting the chemo ward not jeopardize the immune-suppressed patients).  During the first few weeks one of the kids had a cold and so they were not able to visit their dad and it was at this point that I had an idea…

I suggested to my sister-in-law that perhaps we could do a shoot of my niece and nephew as a Christmas gift for their dad (we were then only about 10 days from Christmas) and I was THRILLED when she said yes.  The three of them came over and both K. & C. brought wardrobe and props that most spoke of and to them; it was awesome!  We had a lot of laughs, we wore out their mom’s arms as the official bubble machine assistant, we had a big family dinner, the four cousins all played and had fun…it was a momentary distraction, I think, for all of us.  And it was my most personally important shoot to date. 

Portrait sessions are intended to capture the person’s soul and personality, which is not necessarily easy and which I, personally, consider to be the highest challenge and reward of this work.  Yousuf Karsh, acclaimed Canadian portraitist, said, “There is a brief moment when all there is in a man’s mind and soul and spirit is reflected through his eyes, his hands, his attitude.  This is the moment to record.”  The portraits we were capturing that afternoon would be present in M.’s hospital room and it was imperative to me that he be given images in which he ‘saw’ his kids. 

K&C, Dec 2011

It is very difficult for, I would say, a majority of us to know how to help when loved ones are in need.  There is a selfish aspect to it, in that you simply want to feel like you’ve eased their considerable burden in some way.  We all grieve upsetting news and respond to stress differently and so there is the additional pressure of not wanting to overstep boundaries.  All I can say, having been a bystander to four Cancer diagnoses in close family members in the past 15 years, is that we all have ways that we can help others…sometimes it’s baking and sometimes, maybe, it’s photography.  We must search ourselves for what we, as individuals, can do that will lessen our loved ones’ burdens, gift them with a smile, or provide respite from life’s many obligations that don’t stop just because someone is ill.  I was selfishly, and incredibly, grateful that I was able to do this one small thing that hopefully serves as a daily visual to M. why he is fighting with all the grace and courage he can muster (and he’s mustering a lot!).  This doesn’t mean that I don’t still wonder where, when, and how we can help more; but it felt good to do something that, I believe, was as meaningful for them as it certainly was for me.

I am not religious, but I absolutely believe in the power of our collective energy.  I hope that, if you’ve taken the time to read this post, you will take a few extra minutes to wish M. well.  

I will proudly be displaying their family portraits this summer...stay tuned!

Life is great!

Lori

Daily Doses of Joy

Only one more day left 'til this year reaches an end and I, like many, find myself contemplating the coming year.  I vacillate between feelings of utter excitement and sheer panic:  There’s so much to do, where do I start?  There are so many possibilities, isn’t life AMAZING!  How might I better myself, and the lives of those around me?  Will I be able to effectively manage being a wife, mother, and businesswoman?  Although the myriad of thoughts causes me simultaneous joy and fear, I do believe that the process of deciding on long-term goals a necessary and fulfilling one.  I also believe that it presents us ideas about smaller changes that might act as the stepping-stones to the bigger stuff.

One of my goals for this coming year is to spend a little more time each day ‘living in joy’.  I think I already sincerely enjoy moments in my day, but I think I could spend more time ‘there’.  Between one child in kindergarten, one in Grade 1, their extra-curricular activities, playdates, groceries, housecleaning, friends, family, marriage, working out, Bella Faccia, and my own yearning to learn more about my art and myself…geesh, the days fill up and, it seemed, there wasn’t much time to quietly be present in the moment...or maybe there was and is (this is a revelation I seem to have often but haven’t been able to fully integrate into my everyday!)

Over this past year I’ve been aware of (and inspired by) a number of people doing 365 projects…the projects I know about involve photography, whereby the person commits to taking and posting an image everyday.  Ian McKenzie, whom I met on a photography workshop, was the first person that I actively followed (he’s one helluva photog who posted pics from urban and rural settings, landscapes, architectural shots and portraits on his quest for a daily shot).  I follow another photographer’s blog, Richard Radstone (an instructor over at PPSOP), who took the idea up a notch (or three!) and has set out to photograph AND interview one STRANGER everyday – WOW!  Darwin Wiggett and Samantha Chrysanthou embarked on a year long project entitled “Fabulous Film Fridays” that I’ve really enjoyed (if you don’t already own a Holga you’ll want to after viewing their work!)  Another photographer, acclaimed artist Dewitt Jones, posts an image everyday with his tag line “Celebrate what’s right with the world!”  I don’t believe Dewitt has any set resolution; rather he simply enjoys sharing beauty, and a majority of the images he posts on Facebook were captured with his iPhone 4S. 

I was recently gifted an iPhone 4S and I have been LOVING having a camera along all the time (I don’t typically walk around with my full frame 5D Mark II but I almost always have my phone with me!)  In addition, there are a bunch of fun apps made specifically for taking, editing, and sharing the imagery captured with the phone’s camera.  I found myself playing around and posting photos as I went (mostly in an effort to understand how this new technology works!).  A friend sent me a note a week or two back saying that she wouldn’t object to me posting an image everyday and it occurred to me that a 365 project might be kind of fun!  But then I started to worry, “what if I can’t fit in a picture everyday?”  And then I thought, “who cares!”   

 

Over these past few weeks I’ve used my iPhone to create portraits of my kids and dogs, I’ve captured spectacular Alberta skies, I’ve snapped a few while making dinner (thank goodness for a patient husband and good-natured friends!), and even took one while at a red light one day!  Each time I created an image I felt inspired, renewed, and even, yes, joyful…joyful because I love making pictures!  When I’m working I feel a lot of joy; however it is, necessarily, tinged with the pressure of producing a portrait that, hopefully, captures my client’s true self – and, during my work, there is often an expensive full frame camera, studio lights, modifiers, wireless triggers, and people waiting for spectacular results.  When I’m taking pictures on my own time, and with any ol’ camera I choose, with no rules about what, who, or where, it is a totally freeing experience – I would say that, for me, it’s quasi meditative.

So here I go…I am officially beginning my 365’ish project (the ‘ish = me releasing myself of unnecessary pressure!)!  The images will be posted to my personal Facebook page, although I will likely share some on Bella Faccia’s page from time to time. 

I am excited about this small step I am taking toward a larger vision of increasing the joy in my life.  I hope that you too might find a little project that brings you daily joy – a new recipe a day if you love to cook, perhaps a ‘12 project’ where you read the top 12 books you’ve always wanted to read but never got around to, or anything that will have you joyfully looking forward to your daily ‘meditative moment’ in this chaotic lifestyle we lead.

I wish you a new year filled with JOY and the awareness that we sometimes (perhaps often) need to schedule it in!

Happy New Year!

Life is great!

Lori

* All photos included in this post were taken by me with the iPhone 4S using Instagram, Camera+, Snapseed, and sometimes both Camera+ and Snapseed!

~You may view Ian McKenzie’s work at http://www.flickr.com/photos/tubaism/

~Richard Radtsone’s blog is over at http://richardradstoneblog.com/

~Darwin Wiggett and Samantha Chrysanthou just wrapped up their Fabulous Film Fridays and are now embarking on their new project…you can see their work, purchase their e-books, find out about their photography workshops, AND be inspired to live a life that’s a little lighter on our planet, over at http://oopoomoo.com/

~Dewitt Jones website is http://www.dewittjones.com/

Happy Holidays!

2011 has proven to be a year of change and transition for me.  There have been great times, good times, not so good times, and downright challenging times.  I wouldn’t change any of it.

As the year’s end draws near we tend to reflect, ponder the choices we’ve made and the ones we’re considering.  It can be difficult to know what value our mistakes and successes will have in the long term, but one thing is certain: if you tried, if you were sincere, if you were present, and even if you messed up…there was value. 

Last June I wrote a blog post that touched on ‘balance’…that elusive ‘thing’ that most of us, in this hectic and fast paced life, are craving.  During this year I had days in which I felt, whole heartedly, that I’d achieved that golden state of blissful balance.  During this year I had days in which I felt, whole heartedly, that I was miles from any sort of  ‘blissful state’ and not quite sure how I’d gotten there or how to get back.

What I know is that ‘balance’ is a moving target.  It is up to us to pursue, with vigor, our dreams while taking the pulse, often, of how our pursuit is impacting the other, and equally important, facets of our lives – our family, our home life, and our friendships.  Let us not throw in the towel just because the dishes aren’t getting done or the laundry is piling up; it is on those days, when we feel most at odds with our choices, that we must persevere and brainstorm ways of making it all work.  However, sometimes we are required to ‘take stock’ and recognize that we simply can’t do it all (this realization seems perfectly easy to say some days but is downright irritating on others!).  I've both persevered and have had to change my course slightly this year, and it's all felt wonderful and difficult (such is life!).

I am so grateful to the year 2011 for it has provided me with increased awareness of where I want to go, how I might get there, and who I’m going to be along the way.  I am so grateful for a husband who supports me unconditionally and who offers me the latitude to screw up knowing I’ll still be loved.  I’m grateful for two amazing children who make me laugh daily and who are growing up to be ‘great citizens of the world’ (which I consider my mandate as their mom).  I'm grateful for our two 'first born', Dylan and Dixie, who epitomize unconditional love! I’m grateful for my and my husband’s families who offer us love, support, and babysitting!  I'm grateful to have a passion of my own to pursue.  I’m grateful for my friends, old and new, who encourage and inspire me.  I’m grateful for my health and that I live in a peaceful country.  I’m simply grateful (although I’ll admit to needing to remind myself of this on occasion!).

As I meander this journey of motherhood, marriage, citizen, small business owner, and friend, I am cognizant of the opportunities afforded me and I am thankful.  To each of you who have offered me encouragement, advice, kindness, support, and business this year – my very sincere thanks!

May 2012 bring all of us closer to our dreams (with some balance along the way!)

Wishing you much love, peace, health, and goodwill.

Life is great!

Lori

The Birthday Gift

I was recently hired to do maternity photos for a lovely lady, whom we’ll call S.  She hoped to surprise her husband with beautiful photographs for his birthday…an amazing and personal gift from a very special time in a couple’s life together!

Copyright 2011 Bella Faccia Inc.

S. was referred to Bella Faccia through her friend/my client & friend and was hopeful that the shoot would be fun, comfortable, and that it would result in images that she was proud to gift her husband with.   I was thrilled that, by her own account, we accomplished all she’d hoped for!  Her words, upon seeing the private, on-line gallery, were:

“Thank you so, so much for a great shoot on Saturday! You are amazing at what you do and I appreciate so much how comfortable you made me. I have no doubt that this will be the best gift ever for C. (aside from the actual baby, haha)!”  (S. – I agree, that baby is going to be the best gift EVER but I’m happy that we managed to create a runner-up for the records!)

S. and Bella Faccia worked together (quickly, as the birthday was fast approaching) to create a number of beautiful prints, including a 3 image collage that she had framed in time for the birthday celebration.  When I enquired how the gift opening went, she said, “He LOVED the photos!! I actually surprised him! Thank you so, so much again!”  I was thrilled that the images were such a success that they placed an order for more!

Copyright 2011 Bella Faccia Inc.

 These shoots are so much fun…there is an abundance of collaboration, music, laughter, trust, and a shared dedication to getting the very best shots possible.  It’s always an honour to be trusted with someone’s portrait session; it’s especially meaningful when hired to do a session that will require the person to step well outside of their general, day to day, comfort level in order to create something really special.  S., you are AMAZING and I so appreciate your trust in me and in Bella Faccia, thank you!

Life is great!

Lori

Raising the Bar

Last night my husband, children, and I attended a book launch.  The photographer was George Webber and his newest book is called “In This Place: Calgary 2004-2011”.

I first met George in 1992 when I attended my first formal photography course.  The course was being taught at our local technical college, SAIT, and George, I now know, was instrumental in developing their photography program.  I was young at the time and in that in-between period of high school, travels abroad, and decisions about my immediate and long-term plans.  I recall George being passionate about photography – his, ours, and others’ - and it left an indelible mark on me.

Fast forward to 2007 when my husband surprised me with a Canon 40D – my first foray into the digital photography world.  When I had first taken that class with George those many years earlier, I’d done it with a decent SLR but one that was almost entirely automatic; I knew that I wanted to learn not only about shooting digitally but I also wanted to have a better understanding of manual settings.  In 2008 I enrolled in the very same class (which now includes the digital aspect) that I’d attended back in the early ‘90’s and walked in that first night to see GEORGE WEBBER standing there! I went on to complete the Certificate of Photography at SAIT and was lucky to have George as my instructor in ‘B&W Darkroom’ as well.

During my darkroom class I told George about a party my family was hosting at our farm.  George seems to be drawn to history and preservation; it seemed that our refurbishment of an old train station, and the pursuant celebration to mark its centennial, captured his interest.  I asked if he might like to participate in the Authors’ Corner at the party and I was thrilled when he said yes!

I occasionally run into George – at the print lab we both use or at seminars – and I always feel like I am in the presence of a great…a man who continually strives to further his art, to encourage and mentor others, and to do it all with a smile on his face and a kind word for anyone with whom he interacts.

Please visit www.georgewebber.ca to learn more about the man and his work.

Congratulations, George, on your newest book and on being a photographer and human being who ‘raises the bar’!

Life is good!

Lori

Introducing a Princess

It is with great delight and anticipation that I am planning the addition of a permanent studio space in our home!  Of course the primary reason is so that I can eliminate the need to set up and tear down the ‘studio’ for each shoot (‘cause I’d rather be doing something productive or fun with that time!); the other reason, which is actually really exciting for me, is that I will then have a space to practice lighting set ups and techniques any ol’ time I feel like it!  

So, there I’ll be in the new and wonderful space…but then what?  You can’t really learn to light a subject without a subject!  I do a lot of learning, just like everyone does, on the job; but I wanted more time to play, to fiddle, to experiment, and to be curious.  My first thought was to use models, but they’re expensive and when you're working around your kids’ schedules (which is true for any at-home parent) you want to be flexible…it was pretty clear, pretty quickly, that models weren’t the way to go.  My second thought was an assistant, which is what brings us to the focus of this piece…

I’m thrilled to introduce you to my new assistant!  She has agreed to sit for me whenever I want (in between serving Froot Loops and resolving disputes!), she won’t charge, and she’s flexible/positionable (you can imagine how brutal my web history was last month when 'googling' "flexible dolls"!  I think I had a permanent blush during those few weeks of searching for the perfect ‘assistant’ and had to keep my fingers crossed that the police didn’t need to use my computer for anything!)!  All kidding aside, I am thrilled with the thought of learning whenever I want while not inconveniencing anyone or going broke!

Now, what kind of boss would I be if I didn’t give my new assistant a name?!  For me it felt like naming a baby and I didn’t want to get it wrong.  I desperately wanted a name that would inspire me and so I made a list of things she would serve to represent: grace, beauty, sexiness, intelligence, playfulness, elegance, and confidence all were fairly immediately jotted down (this is how I want my women clients to feel while they’re in front of my lens) and it led me to:  Principessa.  Just like when I named the company; this name simply makes me smile (plus I like the subconscious thought that this very rich, extraordinarily beautiful, and powerful woman has asked ME to light HER!).

Now, this isn’t the ‘secret project’ that I wrote of a few weeks ago, that will remain under wraps for now, but Principessa will certainly play a role in it!

Life is good!

Lori

Feeling WIGgy and Loving It!

I have been quietly contemplating a project for the past two weeks, ever since an idea popped into my head.  I have spent many of my waking hours pondering the project: Will this work?  How would I xyz? Does it have merit?  Why should ‘I’ do this and not someone else?  Is this as CRAZY as it seems? Etc., etc., etc.!  I am a passionate person and I do often find myself going full steam ahead when I get an idea, but this one has me feeling such a myriad of things that it’s hard to narrow down if A) I’m super excited and really believe I’m the perfect person to do this or B) if it really is a ridiculous notion that should never be spoken of again?! 

As often happens when you need a little direction, enlightenment, or encouragement it will present itself and today was no different! This morning I was blessed with two truly remarkable and inspiring notions that seemingly closed the chasm between the cheering and the mocking in my head.

Today’s first inspiration was presented as a post on Facebook; my good friend and all-around AMAZING woman, Candace W., shared the following quote by Albert Einstein:

“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”

Wow!  I can’t imagine that this quote wouldn’t resonate with every individual on earth…we are all unique and worthy and capable of pursuing a path that was quite possibly specifically designed for us!  It is so easy to believe the criticisms, including those that are indirect, veiled or invented by us and our fears, and forget that we have characteristics, abilities, experiences, inherent traits, and talents that combine to make us the perfect, and perhaps only, person able to conceive of a particular idea (especially those that seem outrageous) and then make it happen!


A little later in the morning, Oprah emailed me (we’re tight! :) ) within which was included a link to an article by Martha Beck.  The title of the article is “Dream Big: Why You Need Wildly Improbable Goals”.  Beck speaks of these dreams as WIGs and says that they are flashes that pop into our heads unexpectedly.  She says that when we have one of these flashes we must listen - when our inner selves speak to us, it is all too easy to dismiss the idea as too crazy, too impossible, too unlikely, but if we let it resonate we just might discover our life’s path!  The other critical component is that we nurture our spirits so that we are healthy enough to pursue what might appear crazy to others (and potentially, especially in the early going, to us too!).  Beck writes, “Just as a run-down body may be unable to conceive a healthy new life, a run-down soul can't support the healthy development of the life you were meant to have.”


And so...I had the flash, I’ve battled the urge to dismiss the idea outright, I’ve already taken steps toward achieving my WIG, and I am feeling ALIVE and EXCITED and, shhhh, a little nervous!


Due to the nature of the idea I don’t feel that describing it here and now is wise nor necessary; I do however hope that one day, in the next year or two, I will write another blog post on this subject telling you all about my impossible goal and it's completion!  For now, let us go forward with each of us paying particular attention to those random thoughts that come out of nowhere, and which may very likely change our lives, whilst reminding ourselves how incredibly unique, talented, and wonderful we each are!  Pursue your dreams and don't let anyone, especially yourself, get in the way!

 

Life is good!

 

Lori

You may read Martha Beck’s full article here: http://www.oprah.com/oprahs-lifeclass/Wildly-Improbable-Goals/1